Auburn: Ugly.

Florida: They still have yet to recover from the thrashing the Tide gave them in 2009 (and 2010 and 2011), made Tebow cry and made Urban have a nervous breakdown.

Georgia: Look at their record and they are not bad. Watch them play a game and they do look bad.

LSU: If I am coaching this team, Jordan Jefferson only plays in garbage time or in case of a Lee injury.

Ole Miss: Do ya’ll remember how excited the Ole Miss fans were when they hired Nutt? He has set the program back another 10 years.

Mississippi State: I am convinced that nobody can win big here. The state doesn’t have the recruits and what you do have you split with Ole Miss. It has to be impossible to convince someone from out of the area to come to Starkville. Mullen should start job hunting.

South Carolina: Spurrier is getting a big helping of karma. Connor Shaw has a big game and he dumps Stephen Garcia. Now it looks like Shaw is just as bad. Additionally, he does not develop any other running backs and now it’s trial by fire.

Tennessee: Vols fans are getting impatient? Already? They need to realize that is going to take some time to undo the mess that Fat Boy and Lame Kitten left in their wakes.

Vanderbilt: It must be sad to think this is what they consider good.

* Arkansas & Kentucky did not play.

In the SEC, Auburn wins at Alabama 28-27 to stay undefeated. Arkansas upsets LSU 31-23 to possibly sneak their way into the Sugar Bowl. UGA and Tennessee both win to become bowl eligible.

Going Bowling:

SEC will again send ten teams to bowl games. The Pac 10 currently has THREE teams bowl eligible. Oregon State would need a miracle win over #2 Oregon to get to 6 wins. Washington has to win at Washington State.

SEC – 10

ACC – 9

Big Ten – 8

Big XII – 8

Pac 10 – 3

To date, there are 35 bowls and 70 bowl eligible teams including such 6-win stalwarts as UTEP, Western Michigan, Florida International and Troy.

Army (Armed Forces), Navy (Poinsettia) and Air Force (tba) will all go bowling. Congratulations to our awesome military academies!

Teams that needed a home win to become bowl eligible and lost:

Texas A&M defeated Texas 24-17 in Austin. Sad.

All Louisiana-Monroe had to do was beat lowly La.-Lafayette (3-9). Laffers win 23-22.

Cal and shifty head coach Jeff Tedford lose in Berkeley to Washington (5-6) 16-13.

Now to the fun part: the HAHA awards.

Top HAHA this week goes to Boise who lost to Nevada 34-31. God bless the Wolfpack for exposing these imposters. You did not belong. Now go away.

Georgia Tech (6-6) fans got pretty cocky after beating UGA in 2008 and then winning the ACC in 2009. It’s been all downhill from there. The Jackets lost their second straight to a weak Georgia (6-6) team who was looking to become bowl eligible 42-34.

Miami loses to South Florida? At home? Pathetic.

Rich Rodriguez might be on his way out in Ann Arbor finishing 7-5 and losing yet again to Ohio State 37-7. This was the Buckeyes 7^th straight win over Michigan.

Kansas finished 3-9 under coach Turner Gill. Professional loudmouth Charles Barkley called Auburn racist for not hiring Gill. I think things turned out okay for the Tigers.

Mixed feelings HAHA of the Week:

Despite three Notre Dame interceptions and a fumble, Lame Kiffin and his uninspired USC Trojans lost to the Irish in L.A. 20-16. Both teams finish 7-5.

Game of the WEAK:
Buffalo (2-10) feeling charitable, allowed Akron to get their first and only win of the season 22-14.

Several teams were on the brink of big upsets and blew it:

#5 LSU survived Ole Miss 43-36. The Rebels led 36-35 with under 5 to play.

#17 Iowa seemed pretty content to lead #9 Ohio State 17-10 in the 4^th because they could not stop the Buckeye offense after that while twice going three-and-out. Final: OSU 20 Iowa 17.

San Diego State was up on #23 Utah 34-24 but details are what usually separate good teams from not so good teams. After the Utes cut the lead to 3, they blocked a 4^th quarter punt and recovered it on the 3 yard line. You know what’s next.

Purdue on the brink of a big win over #12 Michigan State blew a 15 point 4^th quarter lead. The Spartans took the win 35-31.

HAHAs:

#8 Nebraska proved once again, they are NOTHING without quarterback Taylor Matrinez. Texas A&M wins 9-6.

The Big 10 looked like chumps this week. With Illinois playing Northwestern at Wrigley Field, it should have been a great celebration of college football, but they turned it into big friggin’ joke. First was the release of photos of the playing field showing one end line ¼ of a stride from a brick wall. Then the Big 10, Illinois and Northwestern officials knocked their three stooges heads together two days before kickoff and decided it was unsafe – this coming months after all had approved everything. Both teams were forced to attack the west end zone – even on a Northwestern interception return, the refs made the Wildcats go to the other end to kick the extra point – as well as sharing a sideline. The Big 10 looked like idiots.

I cannot sign-off without throwing out the HAHA of the Week: Lame Kiffin and his lame-o daddy D-coordinator lost to Oregon State 36-7. Pat Haden would be best served to give Kiffin and his goons (coaching staff) pink slips and start fresh in 2011.

Were you as sick of the Denard Robinson hype as I was? Thank goodness for Michigan State. The Spartans held the frosh QB to 86 yards on 21 rushes and intercepted him three times for a 34-17 upset in Ann Arbor.

How did Arizona get to #9? The Wildcats lose at home to unranked Oregon State 29-27.

Every time people get high on the Miami bandwagon, the team lays an egg. #23 Florida State routs the #13 ‘Canes in Miami 45-17.

Idiotic Colorado fans rushed the field after beating 1-4 UGA last week. The Buffaloes followed up this magic act with a 26-0 loss to Mizzou.

Southern Cal and their weak defense loses to Stanford 37-35. Can’t you just imagine the Monday morning coaches meeting between Lame Kiffin and his daddy, the defensive coordinator?

In the Game of the Weak, two of the worst teams in I-A faced off with the winner getting their first win. If you were strong enough to stay awake through the game, New Mexico State – who the week before lost to Boise 59-0 – snoozed its way to a 16-14 win over New Mexico.

Gators fans thought they had righted the ship with the second coming of Jesus… oops, I mean Tebow in Trey Burton. Wrong. After scoring 6 TD vs. Kentucky, Burton was 0-1 passing with an end zone INT, 4 rushes for 5 yards, 0 catches, 0 TDs. #1 Alabama 31 #7 Florida 6.

Oblivious UGA fans who thought the absence of AJ Green was the reason for all their losses. Colorado wins 29-27 and the stupid fans storm the field. For beating a 1-4 team???

What did I say about #9 Stanford? Every year they make a little noise that the media wants to make into a big noise and they fall flat on their faces (52-31 loss to Oregon). No disrespect to the Ducks – who I now see as the co-number one team with Alabama – but I see a bumpy road ahead for the Cardinal.

#11 Wisconsin – same as above. They will always be a second tier. Michigan State wins 34-24.

#21 Texas – has gone from BCS runner-up to dropped from rankings in a few short months. Oklahoma 28-20.  †

It took an extra week, but now there are no more undefeated teams in the ACC. Va Tech over #23 NC State 41-30.

Haha on Charles Barkley and his best friend Turner Gill who wasn’t hired at Auburn – according to Chuck – because he is black. Kansas loses to li’l ol’ Baylor 55-7. #10 Auburn is 5-0.

Rutgers loses at home to Tulane 17-14. How’s that career move working out for you, Greg Schiano? Still think he is heir apparent in State College, PA?

Tommy Tuberville is 2-2 at Texas Tech losing to Iowa State(?!) 52-38.

†  The above rankings represent pre-game positions.