December 18 brings us the first three of 35 bowl games of the season and boy are they stinkers.

The Toilet Bowl (aka the New Mexico Bowl), Albuquerque, N.M. The poster child for too many bowls: BYU (6-6) vs. UTEP (6-6). I think I’d rather watch that video from “The Ring” but if you dare: ESPN 2pm.

The Freeze Your Nurtz Off Bowl (aka: Humanitarian Bowl) played on the most ridiculous field in America. Forecast for Boise, Idaho is a high of 35°F and 80% chance of snow. This is Northern Illinois‘ and Fresno State‘s punishment for thinking they are viable programs. ESPN 5:30pm.

The Unnecessary Bowl (aka the New Orleans Bowl) played – guess where – in a dump stadium in a dump city. Sorry to sound insensitive but Brangelina are mistaken. That city is through. If you go and value your life, do not stray too far outside the French Quarter. Troy vs. Ohio. ESPN 9pm